I remember when I thought self-care was painting my nails and getting a blowout.
Precious…⠀⠀
That IS a form of self-care, but it’s like going to the gym n lifting a feather expecting to see results .⠀⠀
I had NO idea what the real self-care was.⠀⠀
Let’s call it Super Self-Care.⠀⠀
I had no idea cleaning out the resentment, shame, and negativity that I was carrying my whole life was Super Self-Care.⠀⠀
I had no idea having difficult conversations with my dad, my mom, my sister was Super Self-Care.⠀⠀
I had no idea really discovering why I would run away from people because I was afraid they would leave or hurt me first and spark my fear of abandonment was Super Self-Care. ⠀⠀
After I REALLY starting working on all of this about 10 years ago, I felt an inner peace that I’ve NEVER felt. ⠀⠀
I honestly felt like I walked lighter. I wasn’t carrying all this sh*t, pent up anger, dead baggage – literally like I was carrying around a freakin dead moose on my back. ⠀⠀
It was gone. ⠀⠀
And most of all, my inner dialogue was gentle and nicer. ⠀⠀
NICER!!!! ⠀⠀
My inner dialogue went from that old nasty neighbor next door that yells – Hey, get off my lawn, you punk ass kid!! … to that sweet aunt that is SO fun and everyone loves. ⠀⠀
I don’t know if you’ve experienced any of this before. ⠀⠀
I find in talking to people, they’re scared to uncover things within themselves. They’re afraid to open doors. They’re afraid to see what’s behind it.⠀⠀
They believe that if I stuff this sh*t down far enough, it will go away. ⠀⠀
The thing with that? ⠀
It will NEVER. GO. AWAY. It pops it’s ugly head up in EVERYTHING. YOU. DO. ⠀⠀
The hurt you’re holding on for your mom? The anger you have towards your dad? Your heart being broken in a relationship you truly never got over?⠀⠀
You’re carrying ALL OF THAT AROUND…⠀⠀
It takes courage, guts, and a desire for a better existence to make it happen. It’s SOOO not easy… But once you do, my love, you’re free…